After years and much aggravation I have completed my novel. I am now in the process of cleaning it up then see if I have the nerve to submit it... Time will tell.
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Need to post once in a while
I have such issues remembering to posts blogs. I am a person with out of sight out of mind dementia, so I have now placed a marker to my blog on my tool bar.
It has been about a year and a half since I have made a post and so many things have happened. My husband had a triple hernia surgery and was out of work for a month, the week after his surgery my mom passed away. Two weeks after my mom passed I was told I have a Chiari 1 brain malformation and I had to have a hysterectomy because I was just dangling by a string from cancer. They were able to remove everything and still healing from it, emotionally as well as physically. Then the week after Christmas my husband was laid off work and he is still looking.
We wanted so much to have a family now unless something happens that he finds a job and we can get straightened out adoption will never happen. As for physically It has been five months and my scar is still very sensitive and has a lump.
I am still missing my mom and probably always will.
I know everything will work out it always does and I thank God that I have my husband if I didn't I would not know what to do. It still amazes me that we have been together as long as we have. We will be celebrating our five year anniversary March 20th of this year.
I still have not finished my novel and now at a point I have a complete mental block at the moment and the sad part is I know what I want to write I just don't want to write it. Makes sense right? I am happy that over the course of writing it I am not as dependent on others to help me edit it and have found it getting easier. Believe it or not that was a severe issue for me the frustration of knowing how to structure a basic sentence and not being able to execute it. I still have problems with it as is obvious from this post :) but I am working on it.
I think once things calm down around here and get back to normal I can get my book finished, I am so close to finishing it and have already started three or four more in my head. To much in my head a lot of times to sleep and it gives me headaches or it could be the chiari, I don't know though.
I will try posting a little bit of something everyday but not going to promise anything, but with it being at the top of my chrome I will use it a bit more.
It has been about a year and a half since I have made a post and so many things have happened. My husband had a triple hernia surgery and was out of work for a month, the week after his surgery my mom passed away. Two weeks after my mom passed I was told I have a Chiari 1 brain malformation and I had to have a hysterectomy because I was just dangling by a string from cancer. They were able to remove everything and still healing from it, emotionally as well as physically. Then the week after Christmas my husband was laid off work and he is still looking.
We wanted so much to have a family now unless something happens that he finds a job and we can get straightened out adoption will never happen. As for physically It has been five months and my scar is still very sensitive and has a lump.
I am still missing my mom and probably always will.
I know everything will work out it always does and I thank God that I have my husband if I didn't I would not know what to do. It still amazes me that we have been together as long as we have. We will be celebrating our five year anniversary March 20th of this year.
I still have not finished my novel and now at a point I have a complete mental block at the moment and the sad part is I know what I want to write I just don't want to write it. Makes sense right? I am happy that over the course of writing it I am not as dependent on others to help me edit it and have found it getting easier. Believe it or not that was a severe issue for me the frustration of knowing how to structure a basic sentence and not being able to execute it. I still have problems with it as is obvious from this post :) but I am working on it.
I think once things calm down around here and get back to normal I can get my book finished, I am so close to finishing it and have already started three or four more in my head. To much in my head a lot of times to sleep and it gives me headaches or it could be the chiari, I don't know though.
I will try posting a little bit of something everyday but not going to promise anything, but with it being at the top of my chrome I will use it a bit more.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
A very sporadic and nonsensical rant
I have read a lot of comments online that attack people for being fat, obese, whales, cows and who knows what else. It is nauseating. Many thin people believe there are no medical reasons that it is only because the people are lazy that being fat is just a way of "thinking". There is Cushions, thyroid, diabetes even depression many others but that is to name a few.
The depression issue I have always had problems with and thought more of a scape goat (Slam me if you must, Oh great lovers of Freud the Freak.) My reasoning in this being when I was 16 I was pinned with dunt-dunt-dunt-duh "DEPRESSION". Biggest crock, they had me plastered with all kinds of drugs. Guess what it didn't work yes I was sad and had issues. For crying out loud I was 16 and supporting my mother and myself because of her health issues. Yes I am going to be down but do you think your stupid " Happy Pill" is going to help that? Um no the situation needs to change for me to be a " Happy Monkey." So I have always been a bit skeptical on this specific medical issue.
That is not to say that depression is not an issue that can not be cured in some with drugs. I more believe that for a lot of people it is "conditional" not "chemical".
OK, now that I have strayed from my course and have you all scratching your heads, I only brought that up for my next point.
Myself I do not consider my husband and myself paupers by any means, BUT " always a but", every week when I go grocery shopping I get really, really sad. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE fresh fruits and veggies. I would live off of seedless green grapes, banana's, spinach and brussel sprouts if it would not put us in the poor house.
Now if our financials being as they are only allow a very small portion of these wonderful items to come home with me so I may enjoy their yummy goodness? What about people with a lower income than ours?
So people are allowed to ridicule others because the sight of their "jiggly stuff" makes you cringe? Yet those who are cringing do nothing to help with the situation. You know who you are!!! Those same people you cringe over are probably on their feet moving around at their little piss-ant job more most just to be rewarded to go down to their local Big Retail Store " No names mentioned or insinuated". To have to bypass the good stuff like fresh meat, vegetables and fruits and go to the canned and frozen section to buy their .50 cent pot pies or .69 cent can of ravioli.
I know this feeling I have been there and there are some weeks hey still have to skimp a little, but it is not right to persecute people for getting by how they can. No not everyone has a great education, guess what that will never happen, guess what else you better be happy of that as well. If everyone had a good education then your over paid job is in danger. Without those that barely get buy and work for nickels you could be them because then there is no one to work all the retail and other B.S jobs that some feel beneath them but wait a minute if everyone has a degree there will not be enough jobs of any current market for those degrees to employ everyone. So your four year, eight year or however many year you spent getting an " education" you have just made yourself one hell of a smart burger flipper... Yay you go team.
This is not to say "All" obese and over weight people are "lower income". It may be they just want or need someone to work out with them. It is called say it with me now " Motivation"... Some need another's voice confirming what they are doing is good.
OK, some could say that could fall into the whole "mental" aspect. You tell someone over and over they are stupid day in and day out guess what they will start believing it unless they are very hard headed and they don't care what others think. So if you can't think of anything but negative to say to someone that does have a weight issue you are not going to do them any good or help the problem.
While on this kick this is an example that really IRK'S me. Men who like to give their wives hell about their looks and weight. Yeah she may put on weight and she may not be a super star but if you love her don't be an ass to her. I have seen a lot of my friends go through this, and myself being the sweet docile type creature I am... "Yes, I am going to hell for that one already have a condo reserved." I tend to come unglued.
Some of the things that I heard these guys say and the dog wouldn't even play with them these men were so ugly! Not just physically but emotionally, and mentally. So before you start telling your wife "or anyone for that matter" to loose some weight or to wear makeup make sure you are in your prime shape and looking DAMN good. There are ways of doing it so you are not being offensive and the other person will respond to it as a gesture instead of an attack of who they are.
So a few ideas if you just can't stand others weight issues.
Offer to be a work out partner, coach, life council and support system to someone who needs it. Not a belittler or asshole.
Talk to your city or town council and maybe start a community garden so people have a chance to "work out" in a garden " AND" have a real chance of having something a little healthier than fried crap.
Just a few suggestions and yes I know this post is all over the board and makes little to no sense what so ever but thats OK. It made me feel better and thats what it was written for.
The depression issue I have always had problems with and thought more of a scape goat (Slam me if you must, Oh great lovers of Freud the Freak.) My reasoning in this being when I was 16 I was pinned with dunt-dunt-dunt-duh "DEPRESSION". Biggest crock, they had me plastered with all kinds of drugs. Guess what it didn't work yes I was sad and had issues. For crying out loud I was 16 and supporting my mother and myself because of her health issues. Yes I am going to be down but do you think your stupid " Happy Pill" is going to help that? Um no the situation needs to change for me to be a " Happy Monkey." So I have always been a bit skeptical on this specific medical issue.
That is not to say that depression is not an issue that can not be cured in some with drugs. I more believe that for a lot of people it is "conditional" not "chemical".
OK, now that I have strayed from my course and have you all scratching your heads, I only brought that up for my next point.
Myself I do not consider my husband and myself paupers by any means, BUT " always a but", every week when I go grocery shopping I get really, really sad. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE fresh fruits and veggies. I would live off of seedless green grapes, banana's, spinach and brussel sprouts if it would not put us in the poor house.
Now if our financials being as they are only allow a very small portion of these wonderful items to come home with me so I may enjoy their yummy goodness? What about people with a lower income than ours?
So people are allowed to ridicule others because the sight of their "jiggly stuff" makes you cringe? Yet those who are cringing do nothing to help with the situation. You know who you are!!! Those same people you cringe over are probably on their feet moving around at their little piss-ant job more most just to be rewarded to go down to their local Big Retail Store " No names mentioned or insinuated". To have to bypass the good stuff like fresh meat, vegetables and fruits and go to the canned and frozen section to buy their .50 cent pot pies or .69 cent can of ravioli.
I know this feeling I have been there and there are some weeks hey still have to skimp a little, but it is not right to persecute people for getting by how they can. No not everyone has a great education, guess what that will never happen, guess what else you better be happy of that as well. If everyone had a good education then your over paid job is in danger. Without those that barely get buy and work for nickels you could be them because then there is no one to work all the retail and other B.S jobs that some feel beneath them but wait a minute if everyone has a degree there will not be enough jobs of any current market for those degrees to employ everyone. So your four year, eight year or however many year you spent getting an " education" you have just made yourself one hell of a smart burger flipper... Yay you go team.
This is not to say "All" obese and over weight people are "lower income". It may be they just want or need someone to work out with them. It is called say it with me now " Motivation"... Some need another's voice confirming what they are doing is good.
OK, some could say that could fall into the whole "mental" aspect. You tell someone over and over they are stupid day in and day out guess what they will start believing it unless they are very hard headed and they don't care what others think. So if you can't think of anything but negative to say to someone that does have a weight issue you are not going to do them any good or help the problem.
While on this kick this is an example that really IRK'S me. Men who like to give their wives hell about their looks and weight. Yeah she may put on weight and she may not be a super star but if you love her don't be an ass to her. I have seen a lot of my friends go through this, and myself being the sweet docile type creature I am... "Yes, I am going to hell for that one already have a condo reserved." I tend to come unglued.
Some of the things that I heard these guys say and the dog wouldn't even play with them these men were so ugly! Not just physically but emotionally, and mentally. So before you start telling your wife "or anyone for that matter" to loose some weight or to wear makeup make sure you are in your prime shape and looking DAMN good. There are ways of doing it so you are not being offensive and the other person will respond to it as a gesture instead of an attack of who they are.
So a few ideas if you just can't stand others weight issues.
Offer to be a work out partner, coach, life council and support system to someone who needs it. Not a belittler or asshole.
Talk to your city or town council and maybe start a community garden so people have a chance to "work out" in a garden " AND" have a real chance of having something a little healthier than fried crap.
Just a few suggestions and yes I know this post is all over the board and makes little to no sense what so ever but thats OK. It made me feel better and thats what it was written for.
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